Evil Overlord Zero
by Blackcat0989
Summary: There are some things an Evil Overlord worth his salt should never do. Many aspiring supervillains just don't get it. This is the story of a supervillain who does.
1. Chapter 1

_Ok. To sum this up, I was bored. so I was reading the Evil Overlord List on TV Tropes. (READ IT! TOTALLY WORTH IT!) then i realised that Lulu was a perfect, smart evil overlord-like... thing. so this was born. i won't be using every single entry in the list, just my favourite ones. so yeah. enjoy!_

_Disclaimer: i don't own Code Geass or the Evil Overlord list._

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><p><em><strong>3. My noble half-brother whose throne I usurped will be killed, not kept anonymously imprisoned in a forgotten cell of my dungeon.<strong>_

"You wouldn't really kill me, would you Lelouch?" Clovis pleaded, cowering in terror from me. I smirked at him, cocking the gun right between his eyes.

"Well, Clovis, if I left you alive, that would ruin all my plans, wouldn't it?" I asked rhetorically. "Besides, you can't change the world without getting your hands dirty, dear brother."

I pulled the trigger.

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><p><em>And there you have it. i know they're short, but that's cause they're drabble-things. i'll update soon, so please review!<em>


	2. Chapter 2

_Part 2 of Evil Overlord Zero._

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><p><em><strong>14. The hero is not entitled to a last kiss, last cigarette, or any form of last request.<strong>_

"Please, may I see my girlfriend one last time?" the man asked, staring at me with pleading eyes.

"No." the gun was loaded and the safety turned off.

"Last smoke?"

"No." the bullet smacked into his head in a shower of blood, the crimson liquid splashing across my dark cape and mask.

"And that's that." I turned and walked away, leaving the body to rot in the alley, probably to be found in the morning by some unlucky Eleven…

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><p>Please review!<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

_Hi all! I forgot to mention this earlier but this is not in canon order or anything and contains HUGE spoilers for R2. so if you haven't seen R2, don't read from here on._

_Disclaimer: I don't own Code Geass or the Evil overlord list  
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><p><em><strong>17. When I employ people as advisors, I will occasionally listen to their advice.<strong>_

"Lord Zero. I advise that we retreat, sending out the troops here will only result in our loss." Diethard spoke, turning to face me. I glared in his direction, ignoring the fact that he couldn't see my face through the tinted mask.

"We must attempt to save Kozuki." I said firmly. "Send out the Knightmares. We'll attack the Chinese with all we've got."

It wasn't long before I saw how wrong I was.

"Draw back." I commanded, defeat stinging cruelly in my head. "Reverse, try to get away." I turned to Diethard. "I should have listened to you, Diethard." I murmured, before turning away, barely noticing the light smile that crossed the other Britannian's face.


	4. Chapter 4

_**20. Despite its proven stress-relieving effect, I will not indulge in maniacal laughter. When so occupied, it's too easy to miss unexpected developments that a more attentive individual could adjust to accordingly.**_

"Ok. We'll just wait till he starts laughing crazily, then we'll sneak in and grab the Shinkiro's key." One of the men whispered to the others, receiving nods in acknowledgement. Little did they know that they showed up clearly on my hidden security cameras. But I'll let them play their little game a while longer...

They stood outside my door in perfect silence, two of them playing rock-paper-scissors in boredom. I stayed quiet, waiting...

"When is he gonna start laughing already!" one of the less patient ones burst out, receiving a slap on the head and frantic shushing sounds.

"Quiet down you imbecile! He'll hear you!" the leader snarled. I sighed; this had gone on long enough. I quickly replaced my mask before striding to the door, opening it and stepping out while they were distracted.

"And what are you doing, standing out here?" I inquired, crossing my arms over my chest.

"L...Lord Zero! We... we were just..." the leader spun around, stammering frantically.

"You were just planning to steal my Shinkiro." I finished.

Their faces paled considerably. "N... No Lord Zero!" one cried. "We weren't!"

"Of course not. Now..." the panel on my mask slid away, revealing my geassed eye. "Forget about this incident, and do not try to repeat it again."

Red rings formed around their eyes, all of them saluting. "Yes, Lord Zero." They chorused. The panel slid closed.


	5. Chapter 5

_**24. I will maintain a realistic assessment of my strengths and weaknesses. Even though this takes some of the fun out of the job, at least I will never utter the line "No, this cannot be! I AM INVINCIBLE!" (After that, death is usually instantaneous.)**_

"It's too late, Zero." Suzaku said, his gun pointed at me. "It's over for you now."

"..." I stayed silent, waiting patiently for my former best friend to continue. He waited as well, staring at me expectantly... as if I was supposed to do something...

"What?" I finally demanded. "Why are you staring at me like that?"

"Uh..." he paused. "You... aren't you supposed to scream something like 'No! This cannot be! I AM INVINCIBLE!' right about now?"

Silence.

"... Where did you hear that from?" I stared at him in disbelief. "Because the person who said that is an idiot. It's common knowledge that saying that will bring about instant death."

"... It will?" he seemed genuinely confused.

"Yes. If you say it and actually believe that you're invincible... death is usually instantaneous." I deadpanned.

"Huh... didn't know that... anyway! I now hereby place you under arrest."

I snorted in amusement. "_You_ place _me_ under arrest? Sure you will."

"Watch me." he pulled the trigger. The bullet smacked into my mask, cracking the dark plastic. It snapped in two, falling to the ground with an echoing clack, revealing my face to my best friend.


	6. Chapter 6

_**32. I will not fly into a rage and kill a messenger who brings me bad news just to illustrate how evil I really am. Good messengers are hard to come by.**_

"L…Lord Zero, the… um… well…" the messenger stumbled pathetically over his words, clearly terrified.

"Just spit it out." I sighed and gestured for him to continue.

"Well, the Knights of Rounds have been deployed. They are on course to reach us in ten minutes."

"Which Knights?"

"Knight of Three, Knight of Six and Knight of Seven."

_Gino Weinberg, Anya Alstreim, Suzaku…_

"Go tell everyone to ready their Knightmares and prepare to fight." I ordered. The messenger stared at me in shock.

"Lord Zero… I brought you _bad_ news…"

"So?"

"Aren't you going to kill me?"

"Why should I? You were just doing what you were supposed to. And good messengers are hard to come by." I shrugged and turned away, heading off to the Knightmare hanger.

"T…Thank you, Lord Zero!"


	7. Chapter 7

_**42. When I capture the hero, I will make sure I also get his dog, monkey, ferret, or whatever sickeningly cute little animal capable of untying ropes and filching keys happens to follow him around.**_

"Lord Zero, the prisoner has been secured," one of the black knights saluted to me, standing there waiting for orders.

"Has he been searched?" I asked, clasping my hands together beneath my cloak.

"Yes. We found a set of lock picks on him. He can't escape now."

I raised my eyebrow, even though no one could see it through my mask. "We'll see about that."

I lead the way to the prisoner's holding cell, the 'terrorists' followed, staying a few steps behind me.

I looked into the cell to see the prisoner sitting there with his face turned away from me, looking behind him at the little fuzzy creature gnawing at the ropes binding his hands together.

I turned to the black knights, who were standing there staring into the cell with their mouths wide open.

"You should close those, you'll let flies in." their mouths snapped shut. "Release some sleeping gas into the cell and then remove the animal. Be sure to check for any more."

"Y… yes, Lord Zero."

"Also, remove the ropes and replace them with something stronger. We don't want anything _else_ to attempt to chew through the bindings."


End file.
